Note from the Noggin
The last time I wrote on this blog was in 2017?
Which is kind of a bummer because I actually enjoy blogging and documenting. I had a lot of momentum when I was in a state of deep self-discovery. Then… it felt like a chore because I didn’t think anyone read this. Do they? Are you reading this right now?
Fast forward to 2021. Today. October 15. Someone thought it was my birthday today and kindly gifted me a sweet card (with a cheetah and foliage which reads ‘party animal’ which is funny because I am not) and some fall squash. My birthday is in fact two months from today. But it got me thinking about Mike Love’s song “Permanent Holiday” and how he says “life is a celebration.” So that is how I want to move forward. Celebrating life because it is life. And not death, yet.
When I sat down to write in my journal yesterday, something that has become an infrequent occurrence, the first thing that came to mind to write was “another day to create.”
On Sunday, I asked my partner what was something that he wanted to remember throughout this week. He said “everything is contextual“ and I wrote it on our fridge whiteboard. I wrote one thing down too, and it was “not everything needs to be perfect.”
My desire for perfection has been somewhat of a debilitating factor in my career and part of the reason why I stopped blogging, or writing, or posting on social media, or, or, or, or…
BUT - I have recently gone back to school. Art school. Something I always wanted to do but felt like it was never the perfect time or it was too much money (and crippling student debt was one of my biggest fears, for obvious reasons). However, the pandemic and turning 30 allowed me to refocus on how I want to spend my days.
I want to spend my days with the outlook of “another day to create” and “today is a celebration of life.”
I am inspired currently by my own beginner’s mind and allowing myself to be and create imperfectly. I have been listening to music this week in French and I have no idea what they are saying but I kind of like this state of not needing to know.
To close, I am not sure how this blog will move forward or what form it will take. I do feel a sense of reconnecting with my self-expression and documenting the evolution of this connection. Feel free to follow along, dear internet. Or not. It’ll be imperfect, like all of us. It’ll change and evolve, like all of us. And it’ll be cute and ugly and weird and not make any sense, just like all of us.